Do what you gotta do

The past couple days I have been asked how I have been feeling... Love that question! Not. Ha!

My answer is always one word. Fine.

Here is my hypothesis: I'm laughing, smiling, laughing and still kicking. If I wake up dead, (Did you catch that little pun right there? I just did.) If I don't get up in the morning I'm not okay. I'm dead. Actually I'm more than okay... Be happy for me! I get to spend forever with THE CHRIST listening to story after story! But we'll cross that bridge when it comes.

I don't see how I could be healthier. I live on fries. Heck, I got a TEAM! Body guards everywhere. Pace maker that counts as like nine lives. I'm not going any where so don't believe those rumors I've been spreading.

Perfectly healthy or not, I am grateful for my health.

Out of no where, one night when praying before bed, I heard myself give thanks to my Creator for my health. This prayer of gratitude has continued being a part of my prayer routine.

I am not only thanking Him for who I am but what I have and have been given. Through dark times I've found light. After hours of sobbing I found the energy to laugh. When weak and not wanting to go another step He carried me to my destination. Through my suffering I am given the power to offer it up for those more in need.

My journey is nothing compared to the road our Savior stumbled upon on the way to Calvary. Yet, my Creator designed me for a reason. That reason being to serve Him with my full potential.

Having something rare or uncontrollable in one's life is tough no doubt. Speaking from experience it is easy to want what one doesn't have.

However...

No one is perfect! No two people are alike. No matter how hard they try. I was made to be Gabbie Rehder and to live Gabbie's life. Not to envy or recreate someone else's journey.

In today's world we see that everyone is trying to be different. You got hipsters following hipsters. Breaking that down everyone is doing the same thing as everyone else. I've had a hard time wanting to be me. Wanting to be my own individual.

It's been heard of, that a person just wants to "stand out" in the crowd. Over the past years I've just wanted to blend in. It's really a tricky situation to be both an introvert and a center of attention kind of person.

Though somewhere along the way I found a part of me that is at peace with myself and surroundings.

I thank God because He chose me to carry my cross. Sometimes I call upon the different "Simon of Cyrene(s)" in my life, because I wasn't put on this earth to walk my path alone.

I want to sign off with a prayer...

Beautiful Creator,

Thank you for hand picking me to do your will. Thank you for the times I accept the gift of understanding. I may not be perfect on this earth but when I reach my goal of meeting You in heaven I know you'll see me as perfect. Please smile down on your children, Father. Bless us so we can live according to your word.  Amen.