Exit Buddies

I sit here wearing pjs and a bathrobe, sipping broth from a small coffee mug, distracting myself with pinterest and at the same time am trying to manage to write from the heart. I sound sick, I look sick. I am sick. My exit buddy has left.

She's back in her natural habitat, tucked in and sleeping like a brick.
We covered so much ground and spoke words a million miles an hour.
I was vulnerable. I didn't hold back my emotions.

Then why do I want to cover even more ground with you?
Why is there so much left unspoken? Words I can't exchange with you anymore because only our eyes spoke.
I thought vulnerability would make things easier, make me stronger. But I am only more vulnerable, and depressed. Depressed that with joy there is sorrow. But my exit buddy would not want me to stay depressed. She shares the same heartache from 2,457.2 miles away. But who's counting?

We nicknamed ourselves "exit buddies" at the ocean. I didn't realize it then but just now I thought of  the time we got on a plane together and sat in the exit aisle. Truly and forever legit "exit buddies".

Who am I to escape with now? I can't make a grand exit with anyone but you. You have my back and I have yours. We're supposed to be inseparable.

We're suppose to face our fears together.

Swallow, take a deep breath, say a little prayer,

we have Jesus and Jesus has us.

We'll blink and be back on the same ground soon. Or swimming in the same ocean... Love you exit buddy.

https://youtu.be/rVpVHI3aloI

From the movie Finding Nemo 
Crush: "Alright, we're here, dudes! Get ready! Your exit's coming' up, man!"
Merlin: "Where? I don't see it."
Dory: "There! I see it! I see it!"
Merlin: "You mean the swirling vortex of terror?"
Crush: "That's it, dude!"