I will trust in You
In Adoration I bring before the Lord all that is on my heart and shoulders. The big things and the little things.
I brought to Jesus the things in my life that weren't going as planned.
Normally in Adoration I find a resolution or feel a calm and choose not to worry.
Well, during my hour at Adoration, that didn't happen. I felt restless. I didn't have my burden lifted. (Or so I thought...)
Instead, Jesus put on my heart, placed in my hands, the Gospel of Mark.
Jesus fell to the ground.
I picture the opening scene from the movie, The Passion.
The cry to remove the cup.
I had read that morning a reflection from St. Faustina,
The Grace of Rejection
"Suffering is the greatest treasure on earth; it purifies the soul. In suffering we learn who is our true friend. True love is measured by the thermometer of suffering.
Jesus, I thank you for the little daily crosses, for opposition to my endeavors, for the hardships of communal life, for the misinterpretation of my intentions, for humiliations at the hands of others, for the harsh way in which we are treated, for false suspicion or poor health and loss of strength, for self-denial, for dying to myself, for lack of recognition in everything, for the upsetting of all my plans. Thank you, Jesus, for interior sufferings, for dryness, of spirit, for terrors, fears, and uncertainties, for the darkness and the deep interior night, for temptations and various ordeals, for torments too difficult to describe, especially for those which no one will understand for the hour of death with its fierce struggle and all its bitterness. I thank you, Jesus, you who first drank the cup of bitterness before you gave it to me, in a much milder form. I put my lips to this cup of your holy will. Let your will be done according to your good pleasure; let that which your wisdom ordained before the ages be done to me. I want to drink the cup to its last drop, and not seek to know the reason why. In bitterness is my joy, in hopelessness is my trust. In you, O Lord, all is good, all is a gift of your paternal Heart. I do not prefer consolations over bitterness or bitterness over consolations, but thank you, O Jesus, for everything! It is my delight fix my gaze upon you, O incomprehensible God!... O Uncreated Beauty, whoever come to know you once cannot love anything else. I can feel the bottomless abyss of my soul, and nothing will fill it but God himself. I feel that I am drowned in him like a single grain of sand in a bottomless ocean." -St. Faustina
Trust.
"Do not seek to know the reason why." - St. Faustina
My life is summed up of the word "trust".
All of our lives are really.
It doesn't help to be anxious but rather "hopelessness is my trust."
We don't always get the answers we want. We don't always want to trust.
But as I sat in adoration, I heard this song.
"I will trust in you", by Lauren Daigle
https://youtu.be/vXMPNXXnCls
Jesus, help me to trust. Help me to persevere in trust.
I brought to Jesus the things in my life that weren't going as planned.
Normally in Adoration I find a resolution or feel a calm and choose not to worry.
Well, during my hour at Adoration, that didn't happen. I felt restless. I didn't have my burden lifted. (Or so I thought...)
Instead, Jesus put on my heart, placed in my hands, the Gospel of Mark.
"And He went a little beyond them, and fell to the ground and began to pray that if it were possible, the hour might pass Him by. And He was saying, “Abba! Father! All things are possible for You; remove this cup from Me; yet not what I will, but what You will.”"
Mark 14:35-36
I picture the opening scene from the movie, The Passion.
The cry to remove the cup.
I had read that morning a reflection from St. Faustina,
The Grace of Rejection
"Suffering is the greatest treasure on earth; it purifies the soul. In suffering we learn who is our true friend. True love is measured by the thermometer of suffering.
Jesus, I thank you for the little daily crosses, for opposition to my endeavors, for the hardships of communal life, for the misinterpretation of my intentions, for humiliations at the hands of others, for the harsh way in which we are treated, for false suspicion or poor health and loss of strength, for self-denial, for dying to myself, for lack of recognition in everything, for the upsetting of all my plans. Thank you, Jesus, for interior sufferings, for dryness, of spirit, for terrors, fears, and uncertainties, for the darkness and the deep interior night, for temptations and various ordeals, for torments too difficult to describe, especially for those which no one will understand for the hour of death with its fierce struggle and all its bitterness. I thank you, Jesus, you who first drank the cup of bitterness before you gave it to me, in a much milder form. I put my lips to this cup of your holy will. Let your will be done according to your good pleasure; let that which your wisdom ordained before the ages be done to me. I want to drink the cup to its last drop, and not seek to know the reason why. In bitterness is my joy, in hopelessness is my trust. In you, O Lord, all is good, all is a gift of your paternal Heart. I do not prefer consolations over bitterness or bitterness over consolations, but thank you, O Jesus, for everything! It is my delight fix my gaze upon you, O incomprehensible God!... O Uncreated Beauty, whoever come to know you once cannot love anything else. I can feel the bottomless abyss of my soul, and nothing will fill it but God himself. I feel that I am drowned in him like a single grain of sand in a bottomless ocean." -St. Faustina
Trust.
"Do not seek to know the reason why." - St. Faustina
My life is summed up of the word "trust".
All of our lives are really.
It doesn't help to be anxious but rather "hopelessness is my trust."
We don't always get the answers we want. We don't always want to trust.
But as I sat in adoration, I heard this song.
"I will trust in you", by Lauren Daigle
https://youtu.be/vXMPNXXnCls
Jesus, help me to trust. Help me to persevere in trust.
"And what is the secret to perseverance? Love. Love, and you will not leave him."
"To begin is for everyone, to persevere is for saints."
-St. Josemaria Escriva
Jesus, I will trust in You!
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